It is an absolute honor to join other pastors from Universal Life Church such as Stephen Colbert, Conan O’Brien, and Lady Gaga to officiate today’s ceremony. I have been contemplating the request to officiate the wedding of Justin & Juliette since last fall when they invited me to get ordained and I continue to wonder, “What were they thinking?” Ah, but I’m a man who loves coincidences and what the Great Whatever delivers…and we just never know how our paths will roll out.
For those that don’t know me, my name is Dr. Bryan Ripley Crandall and I work at Fairfield University where Juliet and Justin met. In fact, I had Justin in a philosophy course and quickly admired the way he looked out for others…so much so I hired him to work with my summer programs where his father also teaches. With his territory also came Juliet, as they began dating almost immediately in their first year on campus.
Although I’ve seen Justin dressed in graduation robes and Teletubby attire, it was not me who witnessed him dressing as an astronaut during a campus dance their freshman year. That was all Juliet, and before Justin’s many facial hair transitions. You see, to her it was a Westhill t-shirt. She went to Norwalk. There’s the star-crossed lovers thing, too, and of course she’s Juliet. Stony limits cannot hold love out. It seemed appropriate to reference the Bard.
I must admit, however, the hardest part of being asked to officiate this wedding was figuring out what to wear. I wanted to ask Justin’s mom, Jen, if I might borrow her pink power suit – the one she wore to Isaiah’s and Val’s senior award ceremony last year, but pink’s never been my color and I will never have the fashion sense of Jen. In any court of law, Toni and Kristin might know something about that, the verdict is very clear. I will never have Jen’s fashion sense.
Friends, family, and all the plus-ones, I welcome you to this beautiful celebration, a commencement of two individuals into one partnered life. For those of you who get emotional on such occasions, I also welcome tissue packets. You see, I’m a bit of a leaker, myself….meaning it’s easy for me to tear up over meaningful occasions such as this….a trait I also share with Justin’s father, Dave, and one I recently learned I also share with Justin. Der Marvel-Film war sehr, sehr Traurig, mein Freund. Just imagine Juliet in Germany having to help her fiancé work through time heists and infinity stones, while Germans walked by saying, “Schauen Sie sich den Mann-Jungen an, der wegen einer Superhelden-Aktion weint.” That’s Deutsch for Germans laughing and pointing a man boy whimpering over the end of his superhero Marvel series. Be thankful, Justin, that you were born without Thanos’s chin – I’d hate to witness the facial hair you’d put on such a face. But do know, superheroes are with you wherever you go, and will always run in our blood, as the great Captain D is with you, and always by your side.
So, we are here, together, to join worlds…although they aren’t as mythical and intergalactic as Asgard, the Quantum Realm, or Wakanda, they are just as magical. In fact, I’d argue our world is beautiful. Today, we have the joy of bringing the Wooley, Sealey, Johnsons together with the Bosangues. This is for Juliet and Justin. This is for Justin & Juliet. Their Human Togetherness. The Ubuntu, the Bantu word for community and strength. Around my neck is a scarf, partly because I wanted to show my fashion sense to Justin’s mom, (it isn’t a pink suit, cuz it’s hard to accessorize as a male), but I found a liturgical stole that represents the importance of circles joining together to establish a pattern between the individuals we adore, admire, love, and appreciate – the couple before us all today. This ceremony is part of a tradition, not only to officiate the fusion of both Justin and Juliet’s worlds, but to bring forward the legality of intertwining lives. It’s a circle like the letter “O” and if you add such an O to God, you have good, and that is what today is all about. The good that will comes from seeing Juliet and Justin hand to hand, eye to eye, family to family, and embracing their lives together.
There’s also tremendous good in this ceremony, this congregation, and there was even good during Justin’s romantic proposal at Fairfield University where he plotted and planned the entire moment, but forgot to factor one item….what happens if it is pouring rain and Juliet resists getting out of the car because, well, she’s thinking Justin’s gone crazy. Why would he want to walk around campus during a downpour? It’s all good. It’s remains good. And lucky for us and him, Julet said, “yes.”
Kristin, Michael, Dave, Kris, Jen, Mark, Serena, Richard, Toni, Michael, Linda, & Cooper, she did say yes and, as a result, the families grow bigger and stronger together. Both families encircle one another. Christina, Chris, Zoe, Steve, Esha, Matt, Connor, Claudia, Elise, & Arman, this includes friendship, too, as circles surrounding the marriage today of Justin & Juliet, also envelope you. They’re in this together, and so are we.
Juliet and Justin remarked they didn’t want anything in particular to be recited, so I did as Crandall does and worked through my books to find words for the consecration.
From Plato: Love is born into every human being: it calls back the halves of our original nature together; it tries to make one out of two and heal the wound of human nature.
From Corinthians, Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
From Zohar, A husband and wife are one soul, separated only through their descent of this world. When they are married, they have reunited again.
From the Q’uran, And we’ve created you in pairs.
From bell hooks, Love is an action…never simply a feeling.
Finally, from the Mandalorian, this one is for Ish, This is the way.
And here we are today, together, to put the love of Juliet & Justin into action before our collective…this community…this human togetherness gathered as witnesses to today’s ceremony. The love of Justin and Juliet a gift given to us all, a celebration of magical miracles, and miraculous magic works within and throughout our lives (if we choose to pay attention)
Justin and Juliet asked if it would be alright to share their vows with one another and I thought, “Why not? I’m all about celebrating the voices of others. Juliet, as I imagine might be true for days ahead, asked to go first.
Juliet says her vows
Thank you, Juliet. Justin, you’re up next. Please share the vows you wish to be expressed (hand him a tissue)
Justin says his vows
Justin & Juliet, before I go on I have my own questions: Do you, Justin, promise to meander philosophically throughout your life, to help your partnership with Juliet to grow deeper, more intimate, whackier, and stronger, as you pontificate more ideas, quandaries, and ideological snafus? I do. Okay, good then. And do you, Juliet, promise to hold Justin accountable to his taxes, the finances of the home, and to keep his philosophical brain grounded on earth, numerically, and (perhaps), help others in the congregation with their own W-9 forms?
Glad to hear that.
Thank you for that.
Juliet and Justin, seriously now….please join hands.
Do you, Juliet, take Justin to be your lawfully wedded husband?
I do.
Do you, Justin, take Juliet to be your lawfully wedded wife?
I do.
It brings me tremendous joy to ask Mr. Ishmael Wooley, youngest brother of Justin, to bear forth the two rings to Arman who will hold them for the couple. Afterwards, you may paint a Basquiat painting of the two of them if you like.
A ring represents the circle of life, its cycles, and the wholeness of our communities, very much like the Ubuntu philosophy, and the gathering of both families today. By exchanging the rings, a couple brings forward the promise to join their communities, uniting not only themselves, but their friends and their families, in a symbol of faithfulness and unending commitment. It is time to exchange the rings.
Exchange rings
Upon your fingers are the promise of love and the dedication, hope, and strength of all the days still to come. These rings are the interlocking of a greater story and all the narratives yet to be written. Such is the power of love. Such is how so many tales are written underneath the sky above.
By the power invested in me at the request of the couple to officiate today’s ceremony and through the eyes of the State of Connecticut (and Stag Country), I now pronounce you, Justin & Juliet, man and wife. Woman and husband. You are a married couple.
So the time has come, you two….You may kiss one another in celebration of the day and the fact that you both have chosen one another to unite as one..
Friends. Family. Parents. Siblings…it is a wonderful honor to present THE WOOLEYS.
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